Video: I Studied SOCIAL ANXIETY In Thousands Of Clients & Learned This... (DocDrop)

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- Who here is pretty lonely? Raise your hand. Pretty lonely in life. And just own it. I know it's not something that everyone's proud of. It's like, "Me." You're like, "Me." No, just own it. Who here's lonely? Who here feels lonely on a pretty regular basis? Okay, now when I say feeling lonely, this doesn't mean that you are completely alone. That's what we tend to think. Loneliness means being alone, having no friends,

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no partner, no one to talk to. Now, if that's you, might you feel lonely? Perhaps. But that's just looking at it from an external perspective, meaning that people who may have a lot of friends, who might even be in a relationship, who might even have a family, can experience tremendous amounts of loneliness. Do you get that?

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Have you ever felt that? You might be surrounded by people, but it's like there's this invisible glass wall between you and others, and the only way you're connecting with them is by perhaps putting on a certain front. It's like, "Oh, your day was going great. Oh, that's nice." But inside that little voice is screaming, "No one understands me! I am hurting! How can I relate? Why am I so different?

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Why is there something broken inside of me?" "Everything's great. Oh, that was happened at your job? (laughs) That's so crazy. Oh me? Oh, I'm doing great. I'm doing fine." As soon as you get home, it's you leave the fake front at the door. You close the door and it's (cries). "Why? Just make it through another day, you got this."

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Some tapping affirmations. "It's okay, it's okay, it's okay." That's actually most people. It's insane. This is something I realized when I started coaching and seemed to be behind the scenes is how many of us just lie. Guess what? A lot of you here, even though you're working on yourselves, you are still lying. You walked in this room with your perfect mask. Let's put on the Julien event mask.

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Let's put on the Julien event clothes. Who here pre-planned what they were going to wear for this event? Own it. (audience laughs) Hey, I did too. (audience laughs) No, own it. - [Audience Member] I love it. - That's it. Everyone else is like, "Oh, whatever I got in the closet." - [Audience Member] Your mic is picking up your cape scratching. - Oh, yeah, yeah. Here we go. - [Audience Member] Pull it to the middle. - So once more, let's get some hands raised. Who here pre-planned for it?

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Okay. You didn't? - No. - That was just there, just hanging out. It's like the mermaid pants, like, here we go, yeah? (audience laughs) - It was washed, so it's good. - Good. Who here at least washed their clothes? Come on. (audience laughs) Great, okay. Who here didn't wash their... Oh my gosh. (audience laughs)

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No, but this is very common, right? We tend to always put on this front, this mask. I, funny enough, watched this TikTok video that was sent to me, and it was someone, I forget the name, who used to work for the CIA, right? And he said that there's three lives that people live, there's your public life, which is (vocalizes) the front that you put on when you leave the door, right?

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Here is me, I'm joyed, everything's fine. Then there's your private life, which is the life that close friends might see and get a glimpse into, right? Close friends, family, things that the public might not see, but that you're okay sharing with closer, just more private individuals. But then there's a third one, which is that everyone has a secret life,

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a life that you don't put out there publicly and that you don't even share with your closest friends. And if you audit just how much of a front you play in all of those and how big your secret life is, the bigger the secret life, the more unhealthy it is, the more unhealthier way of being is, and the more pressure and the more heaviness to always perform.

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And this is what you must understand, most of us aren't actually truly living. You're not expressing yourself, you're performing and you are taught to perform from a very young age. This is called social conditioning or the process of socialization. Where when you come into this world, are you performing, yes or no? - [Audience Member] Yes. Yes, no? - Yes. - No. - Do babies perform? - [Audience] No. - Here's my best cry performance. (cries)

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Or do they perform? - [Audience] No. - No, they don't perform. They're just expressing what's going on. They don't have a grasp of the world. You do realize that when a baby comes into the world, they can't even process this 3D environment. They can't even see further than this. They don't even understand what the world is, what society is. What like, "Oh, approval.

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Do I fit in? What's the cool trend today? What is fashion? What do people think?" They don't think that. How do you primarily learn coming into this world? Through feeling. That's it. You're just feeling and you're just expressing and just say, "Here's what's going on. I'm hungry, I'm gonna cry, I'm tired, I'm gonna cry." Then as you start growing up, you start having this heightened sense of awareness.

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Now, it's still very limited where let's just say, "Baby, I'm just gonna cry." (cries) Here's what's going on. Then around the age of say two or so, and this is something that I saw in my own daughter, you start becoming more aware and you start getting a little bit self-conscious. I can actually remember and pinpoint the exact moment I saw her feel in embarrassed for the first time. For real, it was at my grandmother's place,

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I have two daughters, so my eldest now is three, but at the time she was around two, a little bit more, and we were at my grandmother's place and everyone was eating, she finished eating and she just kind of walked off and just kind of tripped and fell. Not terribly, just a small fall, but immediately for the first time, I saw her look up, look at the table and just be like, and almost cry. Not out of pain, but cry because,

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"Oh no, I made a fool of myself. What are they all thinking of me? What is my great grandmother thinking of me? Did I embarrass my parents?" And suddenly that awareness expanded. And suddenly, this is also what leads you to start disowning different parts of yourself, it's what leads you to start playing and performing, putting on the mask. It's that awareness that leads to,

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"Hey, if I'm just me as I've been so far for the past two years, just, 'Ha, here's me. Oh, I fall. Ha, it's all this.' I might cry, but all is good just living in the moment,'" suddenly I start noticing, "Whoa, here's a big world around me. And the currency of this world is approval. The currency of my survival is approval. The oxygen that I breathe is approval." Because guess what?

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Say from her perspective, she might think, "Huh, if I make a fool of myself, maybe my parents won't love me anymore." She might look at me and say, "Daddy, do you still love me?" And I could say, "Yes," but you might think, "Well, what if he doesn't? What if I embarrassed him? Me falling. And if he doesn't love me, what could he do?

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He could kick me out." "Get out there, never come back." "But I'm two, how do I survive?" Can you survive when you're two on your own? That's sentencing her to death. Now, is that true? Is that gonna happen? Of course not. But from her perspective, she doesn't know that. All of you went through similar situations. And this is where you hear this term, trauma, traumatic experiences. And it's a very charged word, right?

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We think, okay, trauma, violence, abuse, war. Is that traumatic? Of course. But what we fail to also realize is that that's viewing trauma from your adult's perspective. But trauma depends on the person, the perspective they have at the time. Hey, her falling down, thinking that she could be disapproved of and perhaps abandoned and die,

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well then it's not just falling down, it's, "I almost died right now." It's a life or death situation. Her survival instinct will kick in. "How do we cope with this? How do we deal?" Getting lost in a grocery store? "I'm lost, I'm gonna die." You might think as an adult, "You mean, lost in grocery store?" Kid doesn't know that. Getting laughed at in class. A kid's perspective, the classroom's the world.

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You don't think beyond that. Did you think when you were say three, four, five, six, about how big the world is and there's all these countries and so on and so forth? No, you just thought, "Am I popular in school, in my class? Do the teachers like me? Am I the favorite student? Do the other kids like me?" I also see this in my daughter here. All she talks about is the other kids she sees at school.

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That's it, that's her reality. It's my family and school, that's it. So if you get say, mocked in school, it's the same as getting kicked out of the world here as an adult. Like what if someone said, "Okay, you're out. Get outta society, go." "I'm gonna die," that's what they feel. They also overblow things, 'cause they just don't have that understanding. They're young, they're learning. So situations that might seem very plain and just like,

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"Nah, it's nothing," to us as an adult, for a child, it's very different. And when your survival is at risk, when being you threatens your survival, that's what's leads to creating a split within and that's when the performing starts. Let that land. When being you, being yourself, being whole, threatens your survival, well then you're gonna cope,

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you're gonna pretend. If being loud, say some teacher's like, "Hey, shh, don't be so loud." Maybe even the teacher's like, "Hey, could you be quiet?" But you might interpret that as, "Shut up!" What's your name? Tell me your name! - [Micah] I'm Micah. - Not you, you right there. You who's to even shy to answer. Don't even answer for him. What's your name, sir? - [Yun] My name is Yun. - Yun.

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"Why are you so shy? None of that shyness in my class." Everyone look at this guy, so shy? Now even notice as an adult, you see that response? Now come on up, Yun. Give him a hand, everyone. Come on up. (audience claps) Okay. Here you go, hold this. Now I wasn't going to bring him up.

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I was just gonna use as an example where, just to finish my point, so we're gonna see what's going on here, if say that happens in class and we interpret that way, like, "Hey, shut up." What are you gonna do? Well, me being loud could get me kicked out of the class and the world. So the part of me that is loud, I'm gonna disown it. I'm not gonna embody it, that's not me. Now say time passes, here you are as an adult.

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Scream as loud as you can. Scream as loud as you can. - Hey. - See, look at that. Now we might think, and this is also dumbed down, mainstream advice, "Hey, if you're not too loud, you just need some tips and tricks," you just need to just work on your tonality, you know? Couple little techniques might help." Now is that better than nothing? Sure. But it never actually gets to the root cause,

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which is that screaming here, even though logically looking at this, would anything happen if you scream as loud as possible? Yes or no? - [Audience] No. - No. Are you gonna die? - No. - No. Are people gonna rush it? Like, "Get him, he screamed." (mimics punches) Like that's not gonna happen. It's not threatening your survival, but it feels that way. Why? Because it's the same younger, that's Yun? - Yeah.

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- Yeah, younger Yun that surfaces and says, "Hey, being loud did threaten our survival as a kid and we've been resisting it for so long." It's like locking the part of you that's loud in the closet, thinking that if I ever open this closet, I'd die. Now, the longer you spend keeping that monster in the closet, the scarier it is to open it, right? So you've been fearing it. How old are you? - Not quite 23.

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- 23. 23 years. Let's just say 21, if it happened at 2. 21 years, don't open that closet. Don't open it, don't open it, don't open it. Here you are. It's like, "Come on, open it, scream." And it will feel terrifying to start opening it. This is also what it means when you feel, when you hear the term getting triggered, it triggers that same fear of death,

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that same resistance that happened earlier on. But this is also, when you hear me say face, fears, bluff, meaning go back to the child fear, right? "There's a monster in the closet, there's a monster." A lot of us still believe that as adults, but when it comes to ourselves. Every part of you opening that closet is gonna feel like the monster's about to jump out.

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You're gonna be like, (exhales) "I gotta face the bluff. It's a bluff, it's a bluff. You gotta remind yourself, it's a bluff." And every bit of you even opening it, like (mimics creaking) You're like, "Oh no, no, no, no." (mimics creaking) Oh, there was nothing there. That is what it feels like, and ultimately an illustration of what it means to free yourself from the past and to re-own parts of you that you locked up.

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All of you locked up parts of you. Now, even on a self-worth, self-esteem level, no wonder you don't feel whole here today, no wonder it's difficult to just relax and just be everything that is you if there's all these parts of you, you're just trying to lock up and avoid, right? We'll keep getting to you, don't worry. (audience laughs) But say this is you, the entirety of you,

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what we do is we all create this split. Here's the acceptable me that gets approval, that gets rewarded in society, and here's the unacceptable me. Okay, being loud threatened my survival here, so that's where I'm gonna put being loud. Oh, speaking my opinion, let me actually start people pleasing. Oh, this thing happened that was just an experience

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that was too overwhelming, right? That's also a traumatic experience, an experience that's just unacceptable. Acknowledging that it happened even threatens your survival, which is also the process of dissociation. Never happened. Traumatic experience. Anything that is labeled as unacceptable gets placed here. So no wonder very few people feel good enough, right?

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Because to feel good enough, you have to feel that being everything that is you is okay. But we are taught in condition that, you know what? I'm not born good enough, there's all this defect shit in me. I'm only good enough when I'm this part of me, not this. And then we spend our lives trying to compensate. We try to overblow this, getting approval and money, so on and so forth, chasing success, looking at society. What are all the little check marks I need to get?

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"Oh, I need to travel and post that on Instagram. I need a lot of followers. I need to be with a bunch of partners. I need to get married. Even I need kids, maybe kids will help compensate for this." But it doesn't matter what you do, you're still compensating. And then there's always the fear of someone seeing through this front and truly seeing you, which is also why a lot of people feel very afraid

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of intimacy. Not just sexual intimacy, but just being seen. Screaming as loud as you can, by the way, or being charismatic also means being very vulnerable, being intimate. The same as singing, why are people scared to sing? 'Cause it's something that's very intimate. So you must reach a point if you also want to feel at home with yourself, back even to loneliness, here, it's like being only half of me is okay.

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So you're not even there for yourself fully. It's not about trying to compensate, it's about dissolving this split and owing the parts of you, the aspects of you, that you disowned. Now, there's a whole process for this. This is a whole 8, 16, 20 hour breakdown, a full step-by-step method. I call this transformation mastery, which is what I teach,

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but one external technique that can help tremendously, because a lot of what you disown, by the way, you can't just become aware of it like that, you've locked it up. There's that famous saying in the self-help world, "There's what you know, there's what you don't know, and there's what you don't know you don't know." That's where a lot of that is. But one technique on the external side that can help is the formula that I teach my client that goes, action, trigger, release, repeat.

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You can write this down. Action, trigger, release, repeat. I teach this to my clients and that's what we're gonna do with you. Meaning you're gonna take an action on the external side, the links to owing and embodying parts of you or a part of you that you disowned, by taking that action, say scream as loud as you can, you feel it, it's going to trigger the resistance around it.

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But when something is triggered, it's when something that was previously deeply buried in your subconscious came up closer into the surface and it's easier to become aware of it. And then you can release some of that resistance and tension around it. And the more you follow this action, trigger, release, repeat, action, trigger, release, repeat, it's one of many external methods that can help re-own some of this. So back to you. Oh, what just kicked in your mind right there?

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I just saw it like, "Here we go." It's like on a rollercoaster. (exhales) We're about to go down. Who knows what's gonna happen. Let's just first of all, look at this logically. It's a crowd and it's people just like yourself. Like technically this audience is the safest audience to be you around. Why? Because all of you are here committed to authenticity. For real. It's like we look around, it's like, "Everyone's the enemy."

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It's like, no, that's what everyone thinks. But no, everyone's just like you. So it's the safest crowd, screaming as loud as you can, no one's gonna rush the stage, you're in a safe country, a safe city. It's weird that public speaking tends to be one of the greatest fears that people have, right? If you logically look at it, "Nah, just be loud," but it feels like you're about to jump off this plane or on this rollercoaster.

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That is also how you can identify when you're triggered, by the way, when your response is disproportionate to reality. Meaning what's actually scary has nothing to do with what's out here, but it's something about this situation is poking at that door and there's the monster and you're gonna have to face the bluff. So there's gonna be resistance, we're gonna work on it, but I want you to get one reference of screaming

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actually as loud as you can, realizing that nothing happened, you didn't die, and then with that resistance that the scream triggers, you can then work on it later on at home following the steps when it comes to letting go and releasing it. So back to you. (Yun shouts) Was that as loud as you can? - I guess a bit more.

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- Well, I'm asking you, would you rate that say 10 outta 10 loud? - Like eight. - Eight. Okay, well we asked for a 10, right? Give us a 10. (Yun shouts) Is that a 10? - Like a nine. (audience laughs) - Okay. Are you still close with your family, your parents? Who do you really care about? - My mother.

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- Your mother? Say there was your mother and she's being robbed right now and there's someone has a gun and you have to scream for help. Is that how loud you'd scream? "Help?" (audience laughs) Hilfe. (audience laughs) Is that like your max scream? It's like if you don't scream for help, (mimics gun cocking) it's not gonna be good. - Help!

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(audience laughs) - She's right there, your mom's right there. It's like, you ready? Three, (mimics gun cocking), two, one. - Help. (audience laughs) - Help. - Help. - Even your mother is like... It's Yun, Yun? - Yeah, yep. - She's like, "Yun, say something, do something. Please, please! Yun!" - Help! - "I love you son, but do you love me?

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They need to hear you outside the room." - [Audience Member] Louder, louder. - "Louder." (Yun screams) Louder." - Help! - Help! (audience claps) - Help! - Okay, now that was really good. Also take in the win and give yourself props. But we can still do better. But notice versus what he labeled as a 9 out of 10 before, this was suddenly a lot more, right? Now what does this also teach you, and this is important,

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is that you get adjusted to how you normally communicate. Meaning if you're someone who talks very quietly, and this is just how you talk and you've been talking like this for a long time, 'cause perhaps in your childhood, being loud, talking a little bit louder, threatened your survival. So you just talk like this. If you talk like this long enough, 23 years of talking like this,

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internally, this feels like normal volume. So screaming, if I'm always talking like this, just doing this inside my head feels like I'm screaming. Which is why you probably rate it as a 9 outta 10, 'cause internally, you're like, "I never say this as loud as that. Oh, this must be a nine." But the way it translates externally is, eh, could be better. So you're gonna have to even swing the pendulum,

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and this is for all of you, sometimes when it feels like you're screaming within, if you're very introverted, very quiet, externally, you're just speaking normal. And you're gonna have to retrain yourself and readjust the eternal to internal to say, "This is the new normal." Which also, again, I always take these crazy examples, by the way, to illustrate the point. And also make sure you never forget. Like it's crazy, right? You're like, "Oh, I'm screaming as loud as I can." Really? Well, if someone's life was on the line,

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is that how loud you'd scream? Well, no, I'd go way louder. So you could actually do more. Now let's go a bit more, and here's what we're gonna do. We're gonna go back and forth, meaning I'm also gonna scream, but every time I scream, I want you to scream louder than me. Okay? So we can start quiet if you want, but every time we go louder, louder, louder, louder, louder. Okay?

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This will also help. Why? Because me screaming gives him permission. Do you get that? Where it's like even with the crowd, when if all of you joining in before clapping, also gives him permission to be louder. It's okay. It's like if someone screams first, you're like, "Well, if they did it, nothing happened to them. I can do that too and nothing will happen to me." It is on the external side to be clear, so you'll still have to internally dive deep,

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but it can help get you that reference. Okay? So you start, I'll top you and keep topping me. - Help! - Let's just say, "Hey." - Hey. (audience laughs) - Since otherwise, the help is good, but if imagine both of us are like, "Help, help," the staff's gonna run in like, "What's going on?" Hotels calling the police. So let's just do a hey, okay, so.

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- Hey. - Hey. - Hey. - Hey. - Hey. - So you gotta top me. Remember, that was close. - Hey! - Hey! - Hey! - Hey! - Hey! - Hey! - Hey! - Hey! - Hey! - Hey! - Even more, top yourself, more, more. Put your body and louder! (Yun screams) - Hey! - Hey! (audience claps)

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- Hey! - Now we're gonna do one last twist on this. So notice even the difference giving permission, right? Now notice what you thought was 9 out of 10 before was actually a 2 outta 10, right? Went to 2 outta 10, then it went up when you clapped at first, probably five, six, and now we shot up to around an eight, nine. But I still wanted 10. Now for the 10, and why I'm saying it's not a 10 out of 10

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is that there's still some tension in the body. So it's the difference between, and there's a famous book, David R. Hawkins, power versus force. You knew I was gonna say that, right? Like power force. Yes, this is key. Power versus force. Meaning most people try to force it, right? It's like being loud, I'm gonna force it. Meaning I feel the stifled, that energy saying,

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"Be quiet, don't speak up. Danger, danger." And then I fight against it. So if you want a graphic example, it's say you need to go to the bathroom, but you're very constipated, right? Lets say you really have to go. What do people do? They're constipated, can't speak. And then they try to force it. (mimics squirting) And a little little something comes out.

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(audience laughs) Now you can do a lot, you can be like, (screams) like that, and it'll still (mimics squirting) a lot more, but it's still fighting the constipation. You could say the constipation of expression. That's why I'm saying it's still tense. So that's you, you're kinda like, (mimics squirting) like that. As opposed to diluting it. (audience laughs) And that's true power.

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For real, there's a difference even in the way I talk, and once more, I use extreme examples so that you will never forget this, trust me, you think of expression now, you're like, "Oh now I can't stop thinking of the little spaghetti string." (audience laughs) But there's a difference say between me saying, "Hey everyone, how's it going? Do you like how loud I am right now?" Now I'm trying to fake it, but it's like you even notice a difference in the texture. Hey. Hey!

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Right? (mimics squirting) As opposed to, so, hey. Hey! Different texture, right? For me to actually be that loud, I need to fully relax. And you have to trust that by, whew, relaxing, you can actually tap into much more power. Force versus power. So I want a power scream. So on the physical level, this means you're gonna have to loosen it up,

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dilute it, dilute it, to make this permanent, this is what letting go does, deep inner work and letting go, is you permanently just dilute it. Where it's like, "Hey, how's it going?" "Hey, how's it going?" Whoa, what, what, what? - [Audience Member] He's yelling. - Right? I can be loud and I can be quiet, but it's still from this foundation of relax. Like, "Hey, this is me." Like we'd be chilling, having dinner. Yeah, you have a good day. - [Audience Member] That's perfect.

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- Yeah. You're like, "Don't call me up." I'm not gonna call you up. (audience laughs) See any good movies lately? - Yeah, I did. - Oh wow, what did you see? - I saw "Kingdom of Heaven" and I started watching it. - What one, what? - "Kingdom of Heaven". - "Kingdom of Heaven"? Ah, "Kingdom of Heaven"! - Yeah, man! (audience laughs) - Yeah, look at that. Right, so it's ultimately, it's allowing yourself,

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the same with being everything that is you, on an expression level, it's the same thing. It's if you want to be loud, you can be loud. If you wanna be quiet, you can be quiet. But the difference between say being quiet, yet still being charismatic, is that quiet people, and this might also appeal to those of you who might also be on the more introvert side, which by the way, I'm extremely introverted. My default is very introverted. My Myers Briggs personality test is INTJ.

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That's me. People always think, "You must be so extroverted, you don't understand us." I'm one of you. (audience laughs) But I've been working on myself since 2006. So it's been quite some time, right? It's like 17 years plus at this point. So if someone's like, "How do I stop being introverted?" "17 years of a lot of work." Now it's a lot less now because a lot of back then was figuring out what worked, what didn't,

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so you can skip that easily, but I'm extremely introverted at a core. And there's still occasionally some aspects of that that surface in my life. But with this type of work, it allows me to choose. And that's the difference. Quiet but not charismatic is quiet out of obligation. Meaning you're quiet, 'cause you're scared to be loud. Quiet yet charismatic is, I'm quiet 'cause I choose to,

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but if I want to be loud, I can! Makes sense? So let's dilute it. And for this, this scream, just something to mentally keep in mind, the scream has to come from beyond yourself, beyond your ego, beyond the vision, the identity that you have for you, 'cause that's also a lot of force is here is me, how can I make this version of me scream loud?

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But you're gonna have to destroy that version of you. You're gonna have to let go of trying to be cool, trying to be approved of, trying to be accepted. You're gonna have to retune with what it's like to be a baby. And you're gonna have to scream. Ready? - Yeah. - So beyond yourself, body into it, and remember, don't try to force, it's like how relaxed and loose can I get yet still, whoa, like letting this out. So we'll go back and forth again.

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Ready? - Ah! - Hey! - Louder than me. Ah! - Ah! - Ah! - Ah! - Ah! Ah! - Ah! - Keep it going on your own. (Yun screams) More, come on. More, more. Like the loudest you've screamed. Body into it, relax, come on. You're tensing up again. You gotta still have the intention to go louder. You've stagnated, you went, ha, ha. And then, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, right?

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Like you can even tap into temporarily, you don't wanna rely on this as a source of motivation, you can tap into this anger motivational fuel, right? So there's different motivational fuels. Think of a car, right? You can put different fuel in it. Well, a lot of people rely on fear. That's like the lowest level. It's like, here's some fear. If I'm scared, I'll take action. People might procrastinate, 'cause the longer you procrastinate, the scarier it gets,

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and finally you can drive your car and take action. Above fear, though there's anger and that's not anger where you're self attacking and disempowering yourself, but it's a type of anger where you're like, "You know what? Enough." Like some of you probably even experienced some of this when you're seeing this, you're like, "Just, come on." Right? Like you just wanna take him. It's like, "Just come on man, just do it." Like that.

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Now then above that there's also desire, and then ideally it's purpose and love. But there are different motivational fuels. It doesn't mean that you must always be one, aim to rely on the highest ones, but at times you can rely on the lowest ones if needed. Okay? You can compare fear as like drinking a super sugary Red Bull drink. Will it give you energy?

00:31:27

Yeah. What if you do that every day? (mimics drinking) Not good, but it does work. And you can temporarily, if needed, rely on it. Anger is like drinking a big coffee. Better than the Red Bull, but you also don't want that to be your default. Desire would be like drinking tea. And then say purpose for love is like having a good night's sleep, right?

00:31:51

So ideally you wanna make that your foundation, but you can still tap into the lower ones when needed. The one I want you to tap into here is like get a little riled up, a little mad at yourself, but not self attacking, not disempowering, where someone could be mad and they're like, "Ah, screw this. I suck. I'm angry at me." And it leads to non-action. Another person they use every time, it's like, say, not loud enough, it's like, "Again. Again. No, I'm not giving up again.

00:32:15

I will use it all just to fuel me to just ah, be more of me." I want some of that in you. There might be some resistance there too. Do you often get mad in life? - Yeah. - You do? - Yeah. - Okay, well let's see. Let's top yourself this time. It's just you louder every single time. - What hey do you want? - Hey! - Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! - Louder, louder.

00:32:41

- That's not loud, that's as loud as you get? Come on, man. - Hey! (Julien blows raspberry) Hey! - Get mad, get mad. Do it. Better. Keep going. - Hey! - You can do more. - Hey! - Not impressed. - Hey! (Julien sighs) Hey! - You don't have to keep looking at me. I'll stop you when it's good. Keep going. - Hey!

00:33:08

- Keep going until I stop you. - Hey! Hey! - [Audience Member] Yeah. - Hey! Hey! (audience claps) Hey! - More, like try putting your body in. Like you're like take... (Yun screams) Yeah, more of that. You have a stick in you. Let's take the hockey stick out. (mimics sucking) Now you can move. (audience laughs) You're like this. It's like, "Eh, eh, eh, eh." Like move around a bit. Like jump up and down a bit. (Yun screams)

00:33:37

Like wiggle it out. Let's wiggle it out, wiggle it out, okay? For real, let's shake it off Taylor Swift style. Shake it off, shake it off, shake it off, shake it off, all right? Now from that, shake it off, you're then gonna tap into some energy, okay? - Loud as you can. (Yun screams) - Hey, hey, come on. Louder! Louder! Now, long one. A long louder one, loudest you've ever done. Go! (audience claps) - Hey! - Hey!

00:34:01

- Hey! - Hey! - Yes. - Hey! - Hey! - Hey! - Hell yes. Do you notice the difference? - [Audience] Yes. - Huge, right? And it's not even so much like the volume is louder, yes, but there's the texture that just changes where you're like, "There he is." Now, even on your end, notice that you did it once, you're like, "I'm gonna keep doing. Like, whoa." (audience laughs) Like it's ultimately getting back in touch

00:34:27

with a lost part of you. You're like, "Here I am again. Oh, this feels so good." Now you will revert back. Like this is not gonna last, to be clear for all of you. This here though gives you a reference to look, you can do it and nothing bad happened, people actually cheered, it's what we actually want. No one wants you to be cool, they want you to be real. That's it. It's like, "Hey, just drop the front."

00:34:51

And you did. And boom, some power came through. Not some force, some power. You diluted it man, you gave yourself some natural laxative. And look at that, right? (audience laughs) Now, things to keep in mind is there's obviously a lot of resistance there and a lot of deep inner work is needed for that permanent change and that does take more time. But when your mind will tell you, 'cause it will,

00:35:17

"Maybe I just can't." That's the thing that really screws us by the way, is your mind saying, "You know what? I just can't. Other people can, but not me. I can see, you know, I mean look at other people, you know they can do it. I'm just different." Well here you've proven to yourself that you can do it. So you can keep this reference as this beacon of hope where when your mind tells, you're like, "Yeah, and you just can't be expressive.

00:35:42

That's not for you, you're different." Be like, "No, I did it once." If I clap my hands once, can I clap 'em again? - [Audience] Yeah. - But if I'm like, "I don't know everyone. I was born a little different. I don't dunno if clapping my hands is possible." You're like, "You just did it. If you did it once, you can do it again." So same here, you did it once, never forget this, and when your mind's like, "No, no, no." Be like, "Sh, sh, sh, we did it.

00:36:07

There is a way, it is possible for me. Work might be involved, yes, but it's possible." Give him a hand. (audience claps) Bring it in, bring it in. And final thing, take it in, take it in. One final thing. So, you crushed it, man. But notice how you're quickly trying to rush back. You even tried to take the mic with you. (audience laughs)

00:36:34

Let the wind land, meaning, and here's the final thing I'm gonna have you do is take in what it feels like, like just stand here in the middle and take in what it feels like to be cheered, to get this positive feedback, 'cause we tend to always be like, "Oh, it was nothing" or, "Huh, huh, back to my seat." It's like, no, let it land. - Yeah, you did a great job. - Yeah, it's like you crushed it. So for everyone here, let's give them a hand. And for you it's like, let this land. (audience claps and cheers)

00:37:06

Beautiful.